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Merry Spookmas

Here’s Dracula forgetting he’s got a garlic allergy.

Guess The Celebrity – Broth Bogie?

Guess The Celebrity – Ben Plankadder?

Another go at Guess the Celebrity after last week’s debacle (hull-coogan/Hulk Hogan… I liked it anyway.)

Gary Tipton – Time Traveller

 … apparently when you time travel it smells like scampy.

Guess The Celebrity – Boat… Alan?

Guess The Celebrity‘s back!

First one right gets the obligatory prime slice of Cadbury Cream Egg.

Do Bodybuilders Ever Miss A Muscle?

… I’m always forgetting names and my keys, so maybe.

… missed a spot.

Hi-Vis Cycle Pants (with dangly light accessories)

Hi-vis cycle pants

Well, the lightbulb pants were a no-go so here’s another attempt… Hi-vis cycle pants and thermal underwear combo with dangly flashing visability/indicator/hazard lights. Suitable for travel, nightclub or home wear.

If this doesn’t take off I might have to consider chucking in my pants designing career.

 

Pants Pitch

I just had a mystery pants designer accidentally email in to ask for some ideas. Here was my pitch… He laughed :(

(This actually happened)

Dennis the Menace is a Forewarning

Remember when Dennis the Menace was a homophobic, window smashing scumbag? Those were the days.

Bullying effeminate neighbours and shooting ball bearings at people from point-blank range are the making of a complete prick, but it’s a pretty genius idea to make the bad guy the main protagonist in a children’s comic magazine. At least then there was some fire in his belly for kids to get excited about.

I watched a new Dennis the Menace cartoon today and it was about how sloppy kisses from his aunties are the cure to hiccups. While the old stuff probably encouraged kids to be turdbags, sanitisation like that will lead to a generation of unthoughtful, helpless meat puppets. (Artist’s impression below)

(That’s a government approved food cube being directed into his mouth)

Having said all of that, kids don’t really settle for cutesy muck anyway, it’s all about thongs and lazer drugs nowadays.

 

P.S. I was more of a Calamity James kind of man.

Viva Los Birmingham


Man In A Cat’s set in Birmingham dontcha know? More specifically New Oscott – it’s got a big Tesco.

If you count all of those trees I’d say there were more trees per capita then any other city in the UK (Sutton Park skews the figures).